Bear News

Not all topics revolve around Schlop (but most do). Post your questions and comments that don't involve Schlop here.
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Nibs
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Bear News

Post by Nibs »

Guys!

TIL that the Greek word for BEAR is Arctus....

And I also learned that the reason it is called the Arctic Circle is because it means "the circle where bears are" and the Antarctic Circle is "the circle without any bears".

Which means the Earth's poles are named after whether or not they have bears in them!

Hoo hooooo!

Bears so influential!

Schlop lives on the Arctic Malm!
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Shnoodles
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Fat Bear Week

Post by Shnoodles »


In the SHNOOD!
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PB
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Chubbilly slouching towards Bethlehem

Post by PB »

Uh, Shnoodles - are you sure that "Otis" isn't really a fake name for DJ?

I substituted DJ's name into this quote and it fits a little too well:
Consider the classic advice for how to photograph well: Sit up straight, lift your chin, don’t get too close to the camera. DJ does the opposite, to great effect. He leans forward on his haunches, pushing the rolls up around his neck and letting the rest of his fat lump around him. On his best days he looks more Hershey’s Kiss than bear. Other bears tend to stand while catching fish, dispersing their weight for the cameras. DJ slouches chubbily.
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Shnoodles
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Fat Bear Week is Over!

Post by Shnoodles »

Hey you Fat Bear guys,

Congrats to Beadnose for being crowned the Fattest Bear in 2018! Beadnose beat out Otis who was the reining champion - and get this - Beadnose is a she-bear!

https://earther.gizmodo.com/beadnose-th ... 1829636074

Cool!
In the SHNOOD!
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Shnoodles
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Breaking & Napping

Post by Shnoodles »

Hey you bear news guys,

The big story is that a bear entered a home in Montana and climbed onto a shelf in a closet to take a nap.

https://deadspin.com/bear-breaks-into-m ... 1835762067

I know how much us bears like our naps, but please remember only to take naps in places where you are allowed to be. You might get tranquilized!
In the SHNOOD!
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Snuffles
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Stop graffiti on bears!

Post by Snuffles »

This is a crazy story out of Russia where a polar bear was spray painted with graffiti!

https://www.bbc.com/news/world-europe-50643315

Experts suspect the bear was sedated first because otherwise the writing wouldn't have been so neat.

This is really serious you guys - now the bear won't be able to use his natural camouflage to get food. Imagine you fall asleep and wake up with graffiti all over you - and then when you try to get food at Chipotle they won't serve you!

We all need to stay vigilant and ensure no bear vandalists are in our midst!
"Thong-the-thong-thong-thong"
- the Thong Song
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Snuffles
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Only mostly?

Post by Snuffles »

Maybe when the Pox is over we could make a trek to this fine establishment and meet some of the bears there!

Image
"Thong-the-thong-thong-thong"
- the Thong Song
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Snuffles
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For Arthur!

Post by Snuffles »

Big bears be on alert - an evil prince from Liechtenstein has killed the biggest bear in Europe!

https://www.cnn.com/2021/05/07/europe/r ... index.html

Arthur is a very big brown bear who lives in a protected forest. He was minding his own business when the dastardly prince shot him, claiming that he mistook Arthur for a young female bear who was stealing chickens in Transylvania.
Gabriel Paun said in a statement on the group's website that he didn't understand how the prince could confuse a young bear that had been stealing chickens from a village with the largest male bear that existed in the depths of the forest.
This is quite hard to believe. It would be like mistaking Nibs (a young bear who likes chickens) with DJ (a large bear who exists in the depths of the pillowcase).
Romanian Prime Minister Florin Citu said media reports were incorrect and Arthur may not be the biggest brown bear in Europe. His response has been widely criticized.
The indignity of not only killing Arthur but then insinuating that he is not really the biggest bear! Outrageous!
The prince has said "he doesn't want to be involved in this sensitive matter,"
Well, guess what Mr. Prince - you got involved the moment you shot Arthur. And pardon Arthur if he was a little sensitive about being shot and killed!
Romanians have been bombarding the website of the Prince's Riegersburg Castle with abuse. Travel review site TripAdvisor says it has temporarily suspended reviews of the castle.
Good job Romanians! We should all leave zero star reviews on the Prince's castle in Arthur's memory. We have to show all the princes out there that it is not okay to shoot bears just because they are the biggest. We need DJ to be able to roam free without fear of some European royal taking pot shots at him. Down with the monarchy! Remember Arthur!
"Thong-the-thong-thong-thong"
- the Thong Song
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Shnoodles
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Bears on the loose

Post by Shnoodles »

Hey you bear aficionados,

There have been a lot of reports of bears wandering around St Louis lately.

Recently a juvenile black bear was shot with a tranquilizer dart!
Image
They will take him far away into the country and then release him. That sounds scary - could you imagine going out for a stroll and the next thing you know you wake up in some strange place far away from home?

Maybe all you St Louis bears should stay safe indoors until this bear frenzy blows over.
In the SHNOOD!
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Muffins
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Bear stuck in a bucket

Post by Muffins »

There was a lady bear in Boulder that got her head stuck in a bucket!

Image

Apparently the bear was trying to get some chicken feed when she got stuck in the bucket:
“Bears want to spend the least amount of effort they can to get the most calories … which can lead to some dangerous situations for our bears, like this,” Clay said.
I think the same thing happened to DJ once with an empty Pop Tart box.
“It’s still able to eat, but as the season goes on and that bear grows, [the bucket] won’t allow it to expand much,” said Clay.
Hmmm, maybe that would help with DJ's expanding problems...

Luckily some rangers were able to tranquilize her and cut off the bucket!

https://www.dailycamera.com/2021/07/14/ ... ears-head/

I am glad that bear is bucket free now!
"You have no life... Writing about Smurfs... GO EAT A MUFFIN OR SOMETHING!"
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Snuffles
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Bear olympics

Post by Snuffles »

The Olympics are starting but no fans are being let in to the Stadium because of Covid

But that hasn't stopped one intrepid Japanese bear who has broken in!

https://nypost.com/2021/07/22/bear-goes ... the-loose/

The Asian black bear has so far evaded capture and no one knows where he will turn up next. I hope he gets to watch some exciting events while he is on the loose!
"Thong-the-thong-thong-thong"
- the Thong Song
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Muffins
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Finally a way to weigh DJ

Post by Muffins »

Scientists have developed a new way to measure the weight of bears - with lasers!

It all started when a bored scientist pointed a laser scanner at the butt of a fat bear named Otis:
"I was like, 'Wow, I got a return — I can measure the butt of Otis here!'" he recalled with a chuckle.
Scientists can use lidar technology to get the volume and thus deduce the weight of a bear. It is being applied to bears to see who is the fattest bear at Katmai National Park for Fat Bear Week.

I might try to measure DJ this way using a laser pointer!
"You have no life... Writing about Smurfs... GO EAT A MUFFIN OR SOMETHING!"
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Shnoodles
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Fat Bear Roundup

Post by Shnoodles »

Hey you Ursus Maximus bears,

Congrats to Otis who was crowned the winner of the Fat Bear Week tournament for the 4th time! Otis' win is especially impressive since he is an older bear of around 25 who has to compete with young whipper-snapper bears trying to steal his fish and scientists shining lasers at his butt. Otis was able to persevere thanks to his skill at catching fish - he doesn't waste energy chasing salmon around but rather lets them come to him. Also Otis has good relationships with other bears which keeps things mellow as they compete for fish.

Way to go Otis!
In the SHNOOD!
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Muffins
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House of bears

Post by Muffins »

Props to Lee who shared these cool photos of polar bears on an island that have moved in to abandoned homes.

https://www.theguardian.com/world/2022/ ... hoto-essay

I hope those bears have plenty of blankets!
"You have no life... Writing about Smurfs... GO EAT A MUFFIN OR SOMETHING!"
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Shnoodles
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Hank the Tank on the lam

Post by Shnoodles »

Hey you bears,

There has been a bear crime spree in Lake Tahoe where a bear has broken into 28 homes - and detectives on the case believed it to be the work of "Hank the Tank" who is a 500-pound bear!

https://www.cnn.com/2022/02/25/us/hank- ... index.html

However, using cutting edge bear DNA science investigators uncovered that it was actually three different bears involved. It remains unclear if Hank was involved at all or if the bears were working together as part of an elite organized crime team like in Ocean's 11. I have the feeling this will all be dramatized on the new show: CSI: Bear Investigation Unit!

Just a reminder to be on the lookout for any suspicious bears that you guys see - especially one that looks like Hank the Tank:
Image
FYI that is a real picture of Hank the Tank and not a recolored photo of DJ!
In the SHNOOD!
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